Our bodies wrote this poem.
There’s more space between you and the edge of the bed than there is between our two skins.
Each time I lose my train of thought you finish the sentiment. Like a conductor guiding the weight of my freight back into its peaceful tracks.
I want to argue like my grandparents argued. Did we buy this shirt in Montreal or New York? Did you eat my last dinner roll? I washed the dishes last night but I’ll do it again today to save your beautiful hands the stress.
The remedies that love gives from growing older together.
I knew your baby faced late teens like I know the perfection of your mid-twenties.
The further I am from you the closer I am to empty.
It’s like my palms were made to caress the folds of your grandeur.
The entirety of God’s majesty exists in your creation.
I’m unafraid of this union unless our together looks like Together.
What would a day be without your sunrise ?
If the world ended tonight at least I knew heaven within my lifetime.
Grief is Invisible
Subway tracks
Wisdom doesn't come cheap .
It comes from a body spent with damages.
And the deepest wounds covered with dollarama bandages.
And dreamimg of presence through painful absences.
This journey is a constant search to reactivate my happiness.
Would it be blasphemous to ask to see God's master planner?
I use to worry about what comes after but now im worried that you sit waiting with empty answers.
I'm at my calmest during disaster.
And start to drowing when it quiets down.
Wearing my black with pride now.
And learning quietness isn't always manners.
Cause some mfs actually need to be put in their place.
And misplaced words remind me I'm not as numb to this as I thought.
So I lie and go on brave, since that's a lighter cost.
And I hide it just because.
I have no space for heavier discourse.
My face a blank slate hiding the straining weight.
Throw my screams into the crashing waves.
And let a Black Bay sunset wash the pain away.
I keep conversation for the wordpress pages.
Writing saves me from decaying.
These posts are a freeze frame.
Small vibrant moments of captured mind states.
Wrote this om the subway home from work.
Imner
Let's build a love with calm hands.
The type of hands that could sew my heart's grandest fissures.
I'm talking a patiently painted picture.
I pray to magnify God within us.
Little scrimmages fixed with care,
Healing the inner.
Planting
I'm tryna cushion the fall of wherever your heart's landing.
There's no need for it to shatter if I'm in your presence.
I've seen you grow your petals from buds to a garden that's well managed.
I'm only leaving it up to God's planning if I'm also digging my hands in.
And working to till the ground for the precious seeds that you're planting.
You're the rich earth, the water, the sunlight, and the flower pot I'd hope to grow my spiritual plants in.
Subway Ride Words
Does our soul glow diminish
Anytime we let the devil win?
Letting toxic energies blend within me.
Mixed ideologies with someone I would never want to be.
No more summer scaffold days no more savoring Sargosso breezes.
Wipe my eyes anytime they get to dampening.
My mind tenses thinking only of grimmer endings.
Took a peek over the edge.
And lost his ashes to the wind.
I guess I'd rather feel the loss
Than lose any momentary wins.
Compressing gears and pushing nearer.
Drag my heart against its will.
And make sure I fill it deep with healing.
Losing her is my only fear.
I'm tiptoeing around my wits brim.
I wrote this on a whim.
It takes real stregnth to look within.
And see all the ways the demons worked to dim me.
The next few years I better hope to enjoy the trip.
Because my happiness had grown thinner.
No more "faking it" left to spare.
Cupid spesred me through the heart and it took two years to find the clearing.
It's hard as fuq at times out here.
Especially walking around wearily.
Scared to let anyone near to me.
Even scared to look in mirrors Because I hate who I appear to be.
Out there
Where do I find the love if everything inside me is destroyed?
Is there any out in the world for a damaged soul like mine?
Does love reside solely in the prayers I shout into the night sky?
Was I ever the right guy or her right time?
Did my hands hold her down in the right kind of way?
There's never a day I'm happy in my own skin.
Sometimes I pray it all goes away.
Other times I push harder for a win.
Random thoughts of course
My hands are bound to her heart.
I have to be careful of the movements I make.
I love intentionally.
I want to suture whatever fractures her spirit holds.
I want to push the pulse of her passions until she falls into everything she is meant to be.
I thank God that she was sent to me.
Solid Gold
You are the nourishing sun.
And the warm sunset.
Calming ocean waters.
And the river that flows nutrients into my soul.
How we ever crossed paths is only something God knows.
Sundee
These keys probably think they know me.
At least more now than the dust collecting journal pages I once bore myself into.
This is my poet's lonely.
You konw the vice I could sprint to.
This is like a prayer to release all I hold onto.
My phone's front camera has seen the pain in eyes and the joy as I type.
I write the heavy and the light.
Dream Big 